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Secrets

Words and Music by Eg

 

Bring forth that which is in you and that which is in you will save you.  Fail to bring forth what is in you and what is in you will destroy you.

 

–The Gospel of Thomas

 

 At the very inception of this project, while I was still writing, I had the vision of writing a 12-song album—one song for each step.  Secrets was my attempt to capture the spiritual principles of 4th and 5th Steps.  It was also inspired by the verse of Thomas from the Apocrypha or, as better known, the Gnostic Gospels.  I have always loved to simplicity and spiritual balance of this verse—how it captures the essence of 12 Step recovery.  So, I wrote a song about it.  At its core, this song is about the healing power and potential of honesty.  Of how the application of honest to a problem—especially relational problem—is often the cure.

 

Secrets was the last song we recorded at Count y Q.  We spent longer trying to find the sound for this song than any.  After about 20 minutes of attempting to find a groove, everyone gave up and came back in the listening room and had me play it for them on my acoustic again.  They attempted to coax me into the studio to play the acoustic riff and let them build the song around that riff.  I refused.  It was partly out of fear but it was also out of reverence for the process that had worked so well for the previous 12 songs.  I will never know what would have come of me playing but I do know that I am very glad that I held my ground with the refusal to play.  I cannot imagine Secrets any way other than it is…perfect.

LYRICS

 

Bring forth what is in you and what is in you will save you
Keep it inside and it’ll destroy everything
Bring forth—and all you have will light your way
Lock it inside and you’ll walk in the darkness forever.

 

Secrets
I feel the weight of this cold black stone
Gotta terror-bird wrapped around my heart
And its eating me from the inside

 

Secrets
I feel the way that you’re looking at me
Your growing suspicion, my crumbing lies
Original sin that tearing me apart
From all that I love

 

I let go of these lies
Can feel surrender growin
I make my way to my knees and say a desperate prayer
I just hope that honesty can still save me.  Yeah.

 

Bring forth what is in you and what is in you will save you
Keep it inside and it’ll destroy everything
Bring forth—and all you have will light your way
Lock it inside and you’ll walk in the darkness forever.

 

Secrets
The source of my sickness
The ache in my soul
The hole in my heart
I wanna let go of my

 

Secrets
The source of my sickness
The ache in my soul
With the whole of my heart
I’m gonna let go of my secrets.

 

 

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